02.17.08

It’s been a LONG time since I updated the web site. I apologize. I imagine people want to know how I’m doing with the business and with my health. I’m having a blast. I’m not making any money but, I’m enjoying what I’m doing.

There are so many ways to slice and dice the numbers. I could say that I had $118k in sales last year. But, I would have to subtract out non-money making things like money orders and stamps and then that number would only be about $55k. That’s not bad for the first year. But, most of it went to paying bills. The accountant says I lost money on top of that. So, I won’t say how much. Let’s just say that if you were to do this then you’d need to have enough money to live on for a year or two until you started really becoming profitable.

Here’s a rough idea of how the sales went. I had $690 in sales in January, woo hoo! I had a 234% increase in sales in February. Then, I went up in March, April, May and June. I went down in July and then went up the rest of the year. I had a 79% increase in December over November. But, then January went down 38%. So far February is looking to be a little bit better than January.

I’m going to admit to something here that I wouldn’t really bring up in a conversation because there are just some things that I don’t want people telling me how I “should” feel. I have a thought in the back of my mind all of the time that tends to govern my thinking a bit. The thought is simply this: I only have 5 years to live from the date of the surgery. I know that’s strange but, you have to understand that the insurance companies won’t insure people who’ve had cancer for 5 years AFTER they’ve been treated. It’s like they KNOW you’re going to DIE within 5 years. So, that thought is in the back of my mind. November 16, 2004 was the date of the surgery so, as of today I have about 1.5 years to live… according to the insurance companies. So, it’s like… I’ll run the business have fun, maybe go broke, maybe not, and then see what really happens at the end of 5 years. It’s kind of like an “I don’t care what happens” attitude. I think you have to have had cancer and had to deal with it to really understand. Then, there’s my mother. She died within a year of being diagnosed with cancer. So, I’m doing pretty good, considering.

Most people probably don’t know that my father died last year, one week before Thanksgiving. He had prostate cancer as well. My sister walked into his house and found him keeled over, already gone. I haven’t had a good relationship with my sister since. Actually, it started before he died when she sent me an email and challenged me on a few “issues” that were on her mind. They also accused me of being covetous when I thought I should get some part of my father’s house, even though he quit claimed deeded the house to his #1 grandson a few months before he died. Then, they locked me out of my father’s house without letting me know they were going to do that and I didn’t quite get the things out of the house that I wanted. I don’t want to sound whiney. I can see where they’re coming from. They have this never ending list of wrong’s they’ve incurred over the years and now I’m paying for it. Needless to say, things were a little stressful towards the end of last year. I started praying about it and then I started feeling better. But, we haven’t reconciled, yet.

I think there’s a reason for everything. We’ll just see what happens.

Saimir’s been the biggest blessing I’ve had since I opened the store. Wow. I needed some help towards the end of the year and God’s timing was just perfect.

I’m struggling with marketing. I have a few ideas. I just can’t get jump started. I need to do something like mail out postcards. I just need to get the postcards made and then do the labels and put postage on them and mail them. The home office said we need to do community events like host a parade. Ok… a parade in the little town of Zephyrhills is one thing. A parade on St. Augustine Rd in Jacksonville is another thing.

I could use a bigger store or I could clean up and start using the space more efficiently in the store I already have. That seems to be a constant struggle anyway. So, a bigger store wouldn’t be a solution to everything.

I like the concept of a mailing/shipping store. I need to offer a few other things that actually move merchandise or sell services to really get traffic coming through the store.

One of the biggest struggles is dealing with customers who think shipping costs too much, or they should get a discount or they simply think my prices are way too high. I keep hearing various things from customers who ship items at other stores and they say my prices are really good. The problem children are the ones who mail via the post office. I simply can’t offer services for the same price as the post office because the post office doesn’t give discounts. The key to shipping is getting the discounts.

I have stories out the wazoo about my customers both good and bad. I have a lot of really nice customers. I like the fact that I can have a relationship, of sorts, with people. I’m not just someone who takes their money. I’m someone who really wants to do the best I can for them AND get to know them a little as well.

I take the girls to the store once in a while. I have customers come to the store just to see the girls. They just turned 1 year old this month. They weigh about 50 lbs now. They’re sweet hearts.

I had my 1 year anniversary on January 17^th. I’m hoping that I can make it another year. The Fleming Island store closed last year. She didn’t quite make it 1 year. Her store was in a bad location. The Chaffee Rd store is actually doing pretty good. The Gate Parkway store is doing well, too. If I could afford to buy the Gate Parkway store, I would. I just can’t do that.

Oh! My health. I’ve had 3 years of PSA scores that were like 0. The urologist said the recommendation is to stop doing Lupron injections since the PSA’s been 0. That’s like taking away my “insurance” and living on faith. That’s something else to think about. What happens when the effects of the Lupron wear off? Will the cancer come back? If so, then the insurance companies were right. This living by faith thing isn’t all that easy. I’m trying to prepare for the worst, should that happen. Lord knows what I’ll do if I end up in the hospital.

I’m not worried. I’ve made it this far. Actually, looking back on the last 10-15 years I can see God’s hand on my life. Some really key things have happened over the years… like getting a job at BCBSFL. There ain’t no way I can take credit for that, let alone ending up with the job that I had. Do I regret leaving BCBSFL? Not really. Yes, I miss the people. It was the best job one could ever hope for. It had it’s ups and downs. I think I felt like quitting a least once a year during the 11 years I was there. That’s an odd thing to say, I know. But, that’s what I found out. Things change. They get good. They get bad. Then, they change again.

One thing I was concerned about when I left BCBSFL was that I’d be treated poorly by the corporation after I left. I mean it can be HELL dealing with BCBSFL politics. I can honestly say that did not happen. They were wonderful. I wasn’t cheated out of anything. They still paid me for 2 weeks after I quit. I’ve been on COBRA for almost 18 months. And, I called last month and they said they would convert my COBRA to an individual policy when it runs out in March. THANK YOU BCBSFL!

Another question I know people might have about my health would be about my sex life. The response is simply, what sex life? Everything changed after the surgery. I’ve put on some weight. But, other than that, that aspect of my life isn’t the same AND I like it this way. I can still say that I wouldn’t change a thing.

I can say that if the business doesn’t work out then that’s not the end of the world, I think. J If I can learn about mailing/shipping and run a business then that means I still can learn to do something else. I know I don’t want to do computer related work. I wouldn’t mind doing something with computers where it wasn’t so technical that I would have to learn about new hardware every year. I would like to do something that involves working with people. I could be a teacher, I think. I just don’t know if I could write lesson plans.

We shall see what the future holds…